Hey…..

you are still reading this shit.

…. well …lets continue with the drivel

 

 

Sometimes I feel like I constantly rehash shit with a new coat of paint.   I feel like I’m trying to sell you a 97′ impala with a bad engine but the interior is mint…and if you check  out all the photos on marketplace you will see what a deal this is.

Fuck me.

and well fuck you too , slappy.   Cause unlike that kid with the impala….I’m not gonna like to you about the amount of coke and ejaculated dreams were spent in the back seat.

I’ve been teetering between this writing thing and  some Youtube monetized “rape you per video” vs. “no money at all” thing that was suggested by a “friend of mine” for a few days now.

Congrats.   I can still type while drunk and I’m ugly as fuck on camera ( unless you wanna swipe right and I’m down )

So years ago I got invited to a “party”.   Mind you, in those days I was thinking of “co eds” and perhaps sexual experimentation.   Turned out…. it was a group of people who where in the service industry… popular as fuck with all the “norms….and…here in a small basement in shitswallow, michigan……were playing Dungeons and Dragons.

If you stop here….there really isnt any judgment and you can forever see me as the door guy in your dreams.

But…

Dog in a dress.

It wont mean alot to you if you dont read all of this…cause it builds.  You cant really porn hub fast forward to the 30 seconds of craziness you need.  But … there is a solid point that will perhaps give you pause and reflect…. more so than that sock you just ruined.

I wont bore you with D&D shit….yes, I play….but the nugget in this diatribe is this.  No matter what it looks like…it’s a dog in a dress.   Why? Cause its funny.  You fuckers on Reddit and Pintrest that dont have some weird shit squirreled away are allhypocrites.

A buddy of mine had this character that always had his “companion”  as a literal  “dog in a dress”   Literally a Rottweiler in sundress.  Problem being is that… all the “non players”  saw it as a normal thing.   It was accepted even though it was sorta “shady”.   When entering situations you either come in as analytical or observational.     Being in my mid 20s, I was very  “analytical” depending on my alcohol intake at the time.    Sidebar: the person playing this character also ended up being a roommate of mine for a few years….. which could be literary foreshadowing …or not…. (hint hint …it is)

Dog in a dress.

Why the fuck is it funny.   Dont know….but you can meme search it to your hearts delight and there are thousands of poor pups in female wardrobe.    For years.   Why.     Cause it’s funny as shit.  But here is the reality of it all…and if you have managed to trudge through this words per min bullshit I hope you get a pearl out of this shit oyster.

You will be presented, in mass, with people who are that exact thing.

A dog in a dress.   This fun thing that, at its core, is a hollow purchase.   But fuck will you buy into it.    I can tell you this, in my 44 years… I own a K9 wardrobe of lessons.   I could seriously go on about the dangers of alcohol…. but then I’d have to put down this scotch… burn “the old man and the sea”….. shit on Hunter Thompson…..and basically get golf clubs and a membership to Costco.

Dog in a dress.

That metaphor comes in both shades.   Guys and Gals,   understand friendship is based on these tenants.

Sacrifice –   understanding that some things are not meant for you…..at least not now..and perhaps never

Loyalty-   word is bond…but trust is sacred.    Burn that and you burn the foundation of love….between friends and lovers]

Heart-  Not mentioned. That late night feeling where no shot…no pussy or dick will replace that gift.  Heart is something you don’t realize you give…and one day the above 2    armor it.

Time– the one thing we dont get back. no matter how someone… fuck it…your person justifies it cause it was “the relationship” rationalizes it… fuck them..  Time is a fucker… cause each one above… will make you regret many in your past by reading this.   So… don’t regret….fuck it.

Dog in a dress.

So here we are…. at the end.   The dog in a dress is just that.   The laughable .   You can dress up all this bullshit in you life and see it…accept it cause everyone else does. People will present themselves as something they are not….     something they are ….   something in a fucked up sundress.   You aren’t wrong in asking  ” wtf”, before you betray all the stuff I mentioned earlier.